By Bruce Borgersen

Finding Mr. or Ms. Right (or almost right) has never been easy. In the 90’s that, of course, also means finding the proper metaphysical match to help us find our soul. Soul searching is now the holy grail of the dateless. Deep soul needs must be weeded out from such ordinary needs such as finding a pleasant human to talk to. Flirting, an ancient and heretofore well understood art, now entails navigating streams of the unconscious and reading books by the guru of love and the soul Deepockets Chakhra (hint: learn to meditate but have big money). Ah, those poor souls still trying to meet in bars.

For the sake of real life then, let’s just say for now you actually might just have found your soul hunk/babe. Life is on greased grooves, you have found the magic elixir and you are soul locked. There still is one little small task left, a pitfall for the unwary soul hunter. You must now pass the Yorkie test.

It will all boil down to this, will Mitzie, the current number one soul mate, take to you like a long lost liver treat or will you be greeted like the monster who brings ruin? Flunk this test and your otta there - history. Because if Mitzie doesn’t like you, you’re in the rear view mirror.